The Dish Fairy Dishes Up Giggles


So, yesterday I had to make a short road trip.  This was a good thing and a bad thing.  Bad because my FIL is having surgery.  Good because it was my first road trip in my NEW car.  I love my new car.  It's little and red and gets great gas mileage, but the best thing is the smell.  New car smell.  I LOVE new car smell.  A lot.

Because I like new car smell so much, I have eaten much in my new car.  I don't want to distort the smell, but yesterday I needed to eat on the road.  (I bet you can already see where this is going.)

So, I'm tooling along at 70 mph and I pick up my drink to take a sip of my cold, sweet tea.  Somehow, my fry container punches a hole in my Chick-fil-a cup.  It's Styrofoam which should be indestructible, but evidently the new car smell has rendered it molecularly weak.  One tiny hole in the cup and guess what?  I now have a sweet tea my new car...while I am driving 70 mph.  Panic.  Absolute panic.  I swerve to the shoulder only to find that there is no place to stop because I've swerved into an on-ramp.  Double panic.  Now at this point, I am trying to drive at high speeds, swerve, AND hold my hands (yes, both) over the hole in the cup to prevent the waterfall of sweet tea from soiling my new car.  Then, I get brilliant.  I just put it back into my cup holder which luckily is the type that is entirely enclosed.  That way I can find a GOOD place to pull over and clean up my mess.

So, I concentrate on driving and find a good stopping point and look down.  Good news.  I no longer have a waterfall.  Now it is a lake.  A lake of sweet my cup my NEW car.  I wish I had thought to take a picture because no joke - there were 3 inches of sweet tea in my cup holders.

What was my first thought?  The dish fairy, if she loved me, would magically appear and use her magic straw and suck the sweet tea lake up and out of my little red car.  I waited.  No dish fairy.  I thought briefly about calling my husband, "quick, bring me the wet vac"!  Then, I decided this might be one of those moments in a marriage when you elect NOT to call your spouse.  (My husband is kinda a car guy and a clean guy.  I can guarantee you that he has NEVER had a sweet tea lake in his vehicle.)

So, I HAD TO CLEAN IT UP!!!!  Now, in my old car, I would have had all kinds of things lying around to help my cleanup effort, but this is a new car.  Therefore, it has not accumulated junk.  So, I did the only thing I knew to do.  After all, I did have a straw and one napkin.  I drank the lake.

Is new car smell toxic?  If I die, it is TOTALLY the dish fairy's fault.  My tombstone will say.  "Death by lack of Dish Fairy" and that will be true in many different ways.

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